Cancer Club

Welcome to the club no one asked to join! I understand your refusal. This club is confusing and scary and makes no sense to its members, families, friends, and the medical community. Plus, it’s painful and emotionally and physically draining, not to mention time-consuming and sucks the life out of you. I totally get the resistance. I can’t say I blame you.

It’s not the type of club where we’re all the same. In the Cancer Club, age doesn’t matter. Any age is welcome. I wish I could tell you that you would meet others who have the same diagnosis, and we could assure you that all the treatments and interventions you’re facing are the same as others in the group going through the same exact cancer. Nope. I can’t do that because there are no two exact cancers around here. Cancer Club members are unique, even though our diagnoses may sound the same! What worked for her might not work for you. I get it! It’s totally frustrating and I understand your disappointment when I say I have no real answers when it comes to being a member of the Cancer Club. You might be asking, “What’s in it for me? How does anyone make sense of this Cancer Club?” What I can tell you is this.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer in March 2025, I found some peace through social media Facebook groups for women facing a breast cancer diagnosis. Whenever a new member would join and post about their diagnosis, including the feelings of uncertainty, confusion, helplessness, grief, and vulnerability, experienced members would reply, “Welcome to the club no one ever asked to join!” I couldn’t help but smile when I was invited into the Cancer Club. It felt cheeky and appropriately fitting for how I was feeling. Never did I think I’d be posting as a cancer patient on a breast cancer Facebook chat at the age of 47. That invitation made me feel seen and connected to others not exactly like me, but somehow, exactly like me. As a therapist, I understand the power of human connection. In that moment, I felt less alone. Some of the heaviness I was feeling lifted, and I found myself checking in daily to read how members in the group were faring with their treatments, who were preparing for their double mastectomies, and whose marriages and friendships were struggling. I posted my questions and received honest answers. On low days, I felt inspired by posts from thrivers and survivors about their triumphs and tribulations.,

The truth is that connection is key to human survival no matter what the challenge. It’s medicine for the soul. For these reasons, I can’t wait to meet you all during the Central Plains Beyond Cancer Retreat! The retreat is a time for connection and reflection with other women about the highs and the lows of being a VIP member in a club no one asked to join, but here we are, like it or not, showing up for ourselves and others. Our goal is to lift you up, cheer you on, and encourage you along with other women on their healing journey with cancer. Our hope is for an inspiring collective of feminine energy to rejuvenate the mind, body, and spirit and to remind each other of the strength we hold individually and as a whole. Together, we can find peace and joy no matter what challenges we face on this journey. It is my belief that together we’re better!,

I look forward to meeting and connecting with Cancer Club friends.

Melanie Gessell